Today I took a step forward. I finally decided it was time to share Dans ashes with his parents. I called the father-in-law and he came and got them. He's taking them to a mortuary to have them separated. A week ago, this wasn't even a thought. His Dad wants to get the kids each their own small urns. Then he's going to put them at some mausoleum so their family has some place to mourn. To me it's not mourning. It's about remembering his life and I don't want to remember at a cemetery with a bunch of dead people. But, it's their son and if that's what they need to do to heal then I totally support that. They also think the kids need some place tangible to visit for their dad. I suppose they could be right but I'd like to remember him at his favorite places. Those places where he was the happiest. To me, that is Dan. Not a cemetery.
That is why, we'll be remembering his life in California by placing some of his ashes where we were married. We are headed over there after our Disneyland vacation. It's funny but it's almost as if I need to do this now to move forward. Letting go and leaving him where he was happiest.
Letting go feels right. It's as if I can almost sense an exhale.
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2 comments:
That's a beautiful idea. Remember him at his favorite places. That's great. Going to a cemetary is creapy. I remember going to the gravestone of my grandfather (not to mourn, but to plant flowers and make it pretty), and it freaked me out. I hated the idea of walking where the dead were burried. I would imagine that being where ashes of the dead are would be a little scary too. Anyway, what a fantastic way to remember their dad; the very place that the Sauer family started. Perfect. As believers, we celebrate the life that was here on earth and now is in glory. We know that he is alive, because of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I'm so proud of you!
Thanks friend. :) ((HUGS))
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